Through the Wilderness

Thursday, August 31, 2006

the compromise one cannot make

I read The compromise one cannot make in the NST online today.

Sir, I salute you.
I salute your commitment to justice
I salute your love for our nation.
I salute you for your courage.

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HELP!

Dear all,

'Of Wishes and Dreams' (my main blog) cannot be accessed for the moment.

Each time I click in the above url link I get this message:
"We're sorry, but we were unable to complete your request."


I have gone into Bloggers Help to look for a solution and also emailed Blogger etc .. but so far - the problem remains.


spyder <------ who is very upset at the moment :(

UPDATE : OF WISHES AND DREAMS is up and running again! yay!


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Tuesday, August 29, 2006

Pray not for Arab or Jew ...




'Pray not for Arab or Jew, for Palestinian or Israeli,
But pray rather for ourselves,
that we may not divide them in our prayers
Rather keep them both together in our hearts.'

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Saturday, August 26, 2006

For my children

I wish you Jesus
to soothe your pain away.
I wish you Jesus
to brighten up your days.
I wish you Jesus
to help you find your way.

I wish you Hope
when you feel broken with despair.
I wish you Charity
in your dealings with this selfish world.
I wish you Love
when you are hurting and in pain.
I wish you Wisdom
when you walk life's arduous road.
I wish you Joy
to light up all your days.
I wish you Faith
to keep you on your way.

I wish you Jesus
for he has seen me through the storms.
I wish you Jesus
for he will always be your companion and friend.

copyright ©spyder



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Friday, August 25, 2006

written on 2nd July 2006


oftimes i am tossed
like a ragged doll
in the storms
of life.
bewildered, frustrated, desperate
i lash out at God.
in the midst of the turmoil
i hear Him say,
"Be still and know that I am God."
at times i think it means
"Be quiet. Shut up and listen to me."
at other times
"Shut up and stop complaining. Listen!"
but most times it means
" I am here. It's gonna be alright."

copyright ©spyder



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Thursday, August 24, 2006

and God replies

My Child,

I hear you. I always do. Sometimes I choose to remain silent. You see, when I created you, I gave you a brain, amongst other gifts. I also gave you a heart. You need to use these to navigate your way as you journey home to me. You need to grow in wisdom and in love.

No doubt, you know that it is by My grace that you have been saved and that is true. But I have also given you and mankind a very precious gift - the gift of FREE CHOICE. So, as you journey, you need to be able to make the right choices. You need your brain, your heart and My grace to do that. So, sometimes I sit back and wait - and watch - to teach you. As you open your heart to my promptings and use the mind that I have given you - you will grow in wisdom and in love. Am I making any sense to you? Ahhh you will ...in time.

These last few weeks and months - I have heard your cries.

When you could walk calmly away and not feel that all was lost,
- that was Me taking you by the hand and guiding you;
when you could tell yourself that 'It's ok. There will be another way.'
- that was Me comforting and reassuring you;
when you had true friends rallying around you,
- that was Me embracing you in My love.

I know you are bitter and angry - and that's ok. But you have to forgive and move on - for your journey is a special one - one that will lead you back to Me - so stay the course and all will be well. Trust me! Know that I love you - warts and all!


Father God


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Wednesday, August 23, 2006

in good times and in bad

In good times,
it is so easy to stay the course
it is so easy to thank God.
In good times,
it is so easy to tell God I love Him and to praise Him.
May I continue
to thank and praise Him in times of sorrow and grief.

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Monday, August 21, 2006

Letters to God - No. 2

Dear God,

Are you listening? Are you really here? You know, sometimes I do wonder.

After I wrote you this morning, I smiled to myself and said to myself , Someone out there reading this letter would think
  • I am nuts
  • I am just talking to myself
  • I am just talking nonsense
  • I have nothing better to blog about
Anyway, be that as it may, here I am writing to you again. Afterall, I have been talking to you all my life - just have not been putting it on paper, that's all.

So, lest the last letter I wrote to you gave readers the impression that once I talked to you, you did a 'miracle cure' on me - well, it did not quite happen. Yes, the head is a bit better. Yes, the body did not hurt as much as the last few days. BUT No, the pain is not totally gone. I have OA, and this means I live with pain every day of my life - sometimes it's not that bad- it's bearable; at other times, the pain can be rather bad - that's when I need to take my meds. This means that every day when I wake up, I have some form of pain - to a greater or lesser degree depending on the day. That's why I am crabby in the mornings.

Lord, you do have a great sense of humour. I know - this you have demonstrated in more ways than I can recall. Perhaps I shall write about some of these occasions in my letters - just so I can 'recall' all this when I have well and truly lost my memory. Actually, I am losing my memory rather frequently these days. Ahhh ...but you know that too, right?

Have to go now. Gotta go to church this evening. So have to get something to eat before that. You are coming along with me - as you go everywhere with me - right?

Much love,
me

P.S. My tummy feels unwell too. Do you think you can do something about that? Thanks

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Letters to God - No. 1

Dear God,

It has been a hectic week. I know I complain a lot about the amount of work I have. But that's just me - the eternal complainer. I do get fed-up listening to myself whine sometimes. I am sure it gets annoying to others around me who have to listen to me too. But you Lord, you made me like that, no? You know that I complain a lot but that deep inside me, I love what I do and I am grateful that I have my work. The thing is - some people wonder how it is that I can be so stressed out over something that I like doing. Beats me too!

The week has also been quite lousy as I had that beastly cold - it was not half as nasty as the last bout of flu I had, though - so thanks :) . What was really bad was I had awful pains all over my body all week. You know, the pain got so severe that I threw caution to the wind and downed those painkiller, right? Well, they killed the pain temporarily but they also killed my tummy in the process. Gastic pains can be quite quite horrible. So I had to rush off to the chemist to get meds for the tummy. I called you and said I hope I did not have to go see the docs. Well, thanks again for the tummy pains got better soon after that. But I learnt my lesson - I have to remember to take my antiacids with those painkillers.

The body aches continued - my bones felt like they had been crushed under a tractor - and my head was pounding like crazy. There did not seem to be any letting up - and since I had had that terrible experience with the pain killers - I refrained from dosing myself again with them - hence had to bear with the pain.

Then, yesterday
at mass, I told you all the above.
at mass, I asked you to make the pain go away
at mass, I felt my pain was nothing compared to what you bore for me
at mass, I remembered that you gave your life for me
at mass, I thought of all the pain you bore for me
at mass, I asked for the grace to bear it all
at mass, I offered up my pain to you
at mass, I asked you to touch me and come into my life
at mass, I felt you so close to me.

When I went to bed
last night, my body and head continued to hurt.
last night, I remembered my encounter with you at mass.
last night, I ceased to complain about the pain
last night, my body ached but my heart was at peace
last night, I went to bed without taking any pills.

When I awoke
this morning, I saw my husband beside me
this morning, I thanked you, God, for the gift of him
this morning, I told good hubby how much I love him
this morning, I did not get up in a crabby mood
this morning, I remembered to thank you, Lord, for my life
this morning, my body aches have somehow disappeared.
this morning, my head feels light and I can think clearly.
this morning, I want to thank you, Lord.

Thank you, Lord!

With much love,
me

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Thursday, August 17, 2006

Do you love me enough?

Have I asked you today,
Do you love me?
Have you heard me call your name?
Well, I'm asking you now,
Do you love me?
And I'll ask you again and again.





Do you love me enough to take up you cross
and follow where I lead?

Will you tend my lambs and feed my sheep?
And die for such as these?



The above lines from one of my favourite hymns challenge me to take up my cross and follow Christ. The harvest is plenty but the labourers are few. There is much work to be done. Lord, grant me the strength to do Your will.


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Monday, August 14, 2006

Because He Lives


"Because He lives
I can face tomorrow
Because He lives
All fear is gone
And because I know, I know
He holds the future
And life is worth the living
Just because He lives."

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Sunday, August 13, 2006

My God and I


lnto
my life
You
came
denied You; yes, I did
joy short-lived, lost in days of confusion
agony and mental anguish
till
I let
You
into
my heart
once again

copyright ©spyder



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We do not own God.

"All human beings powerfully sustain one another. The lovers of God in this contingent world becomes the mercies and the blessings sent out by that gentle King of the seen and unseen realms. Let them purify their sight and behold all humankind as leaves and blossoms and fruits of the Tree of Being."
Baha"Ullah (1817-1892) Persia

If only we can see ourselves as 'leaves and blossoms, and fruits of the Tree of Being'. Unfortunately, many of us are parasites and predators. Instead of 'powerfully sustaining one another', we are destroying and killing one another. Sad, isn't it?

In the name of religion, we maim and we kill. We claim to be 'holy people' and we behave as if we have a monopoly on God. Yet, the truth is we do not own God. He created us and we are but His people; He owns us. Would that we, the peoples of the earth, all be humbled by this realisation and not let our egos deceive us into thinking that we own Him or even worse, that we can take HIS place and thus play God.

(art: Picasso's 'Guernica')
http://www.pbs.org/treasuresoftheworld/a_nav/guernica_nav/main_guerfrm.html


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Faith


'Faith is a dark night for man, but in this very way it gives him light.'
'Like a blind man he must lean on dark faith, accept it for his guide and light, and rest on nothing of what he understands, tastes, feels, or imagines.'

St. John of the Cross on the Journey of the Soul to God by Contemplation

"Christian mysticism is an experience of God's loving presence in the depths of our hearts ... "

(The beautiful photo above was taken by dear hubby on one of our trips away from home. He had waited patiently for just the right moment to capture it with his camera. Indeed God has blessed him with much talent and ... patience! Photo@andrew)


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Saturday, August 12, 2006

One God


As the rain dropping from the sky
wends its way toward the oceans,
So the prostrations offered in all faiths
reach the One God, who is supreme.
From the Rig Veda (c.1500 - c.1000BCE), India

When I chanced upon this verse I was struck immediately by its beauty. If only all man could appreciate that God is the God of ALL and not exclusive to some; if only we could accept that the different forms of religious worship are ALL God-centred; if only we recognized that all men of goodwill have much love for the Almighty and they worship Him in a variety of forms; if only we judged less and respected one another's beliefs more - then perhaps we would have a better chance of attaining peace on earth.Too much blood has been shed through the ages in the name of religion.


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reflections of a pilgrim

Sunday, December 04, 2005

We are pilgrims on life's journey. This, I know but this I often forget.

I went on a short pilgrimage this weekend. The destination was an old city (of historical and religious significance) which was just a few hours away by road. This short pilgrimage over the weekend set me thinking again that hubby and I should go to Lourdes or the Holy Land soon.

Why did I go on this pilgrimage? Below are some reasons (not in order of priority)
1. Initially, it was as a show of support for those who were organizing the event.
2. To satisfy my curiosity as to what the whole event was about.
3. Thought it would be nice to be in the company of some church friends for the weekend
4. To get away from my hectic work schedule and find some time for God

Being with God and looking for God was not the main reason why I went on the pilgrimage.

My experience.
1. On the first day, the first afternoon, to be precise, when we had to go to the specified places to meditate and to pray, I must say that I was not too taken up with the idea of a pilgrimage. Things were slow-paced and I was not used to the quiet and 'nothing to drive myself to' sort of tempo. In fact, when a friend remarked, 'I don't think I'm very much a pilgrimage kind of person' , I nodded in agreement and said. 'Me neither.' And I began to think that perhaps I should shelf forever any thoughts I had of going to the Holy Land.
As the day went on, I began to notice a change in my disposition and I think I was more patient and calm than I had been in weeks. I did not notice it much then, but I do now.

2. The second day was a good day. I can see much goodness in all people.
I am reminded that I have many more miles to go and that I have to look to God for graces to continue on my way.

3. I have to set aside more quiet time for God.

4. I need to remember that all that I do, should be for the Greater Glory of God.

I know now that while I did not go on the pilgrimage primarily just to look for God, HE was present with me all through my 'journey' and HE has blessed me with the experience.


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The Rainbow


Looking out the window
A rainbow caught my eye

It had a certain special glow
As it spanned across the sky.

A rainbow caught my eye
It spoke to me of God's blessings .
As it spanned across the sky
I gazed at the wondrous sight.

It spoke to me of God's blessings
The beauty of His creation revealed.
I gazed at the wondrous sight
Till the clouds, the rainbow they concealed.

The rainbow that I saw that day
It had a certain special glow .
I felt God's presence that day
Looking out the window.

copyright ©spyder


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in my quiet moments ..

In my quiet moments I think of you.
I see you in the people who love me.
I see you in the morning light that greets me.
I feel you in gentle breeze that brushes softly against me.
I know you are near and that you watch over me.
In my quiet moments, you speak to me.

copyright ©spyder


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I am thankful


Yet another day has come to a close.
I am thankful for
my family and my home
friends I can count on
my job
my life
and most of all
my faith.
I have truly been blessed!

copyright ©spyder



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God's Majesty

As I set my gaze upon the mountains high,
I can sense God's majesty and might.
The beauty and splendour of His creation, I see.
I feel the steadfastness of his love for me.

copyright© spyder

God’s Majesty

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